Happy
by The Hawk Eye
Summary: One-shot. How could he not be happy after everything? He is happy just watching the rest hugging their loves ones. He is happy after defeating Thanos and having everybody back.


Disclaimer: none of this belongs to me. This is only my failed attemp to fix the film.

I want to fix this film but... I failed. I'm too traumatized yet by what happened. And this is what came out from all that trauma.

English is not my first language so sorry for the mistakes.

 **Happy**

Thor is happy; he really is happy. How could he not be happy after everything? He is happy just watching the rest hugging their loves ones. He is happy after defeating Thanos and having everybody back. Thor is happy. If he could he would go to all of them he would squeeze them against his chest full of joy.

But he can't because it is not the right moment.

They all need time to reunite with their love one and enjoy the feeling of fulfilment that comes with it. So Thor waits there and enjoys their happiness while trying to ignore the emptiness that is swallowing his heart second by second.

Thor tells himself he's happy because he is happy; he must be happy, have to... They defeated Thanos and restored the order in the universe and all those who died under the influence of the gems have come back to life. So Thor must be happy...

However he is not happy; not as happy as he should be at least. He doesn't feel complete after this heroic victory over the mighty Thanos. Thor feels the anguish of being incomplete eating him alive... And he wants to be happy so desperately but he is not... though he should.

Suddenly he feels a shy tap on his shoulder. He turns his head to find Bruce next to him smiling softly at him. It's a sad smile and Thor has the need to say something to make him smile for real but no words come to him. He's speechless and lost in that moment. "Are you ok?" Bruce asks him with a candid voice.

"I'm good." It's the only thing he can say. Thor wants to add something else but he knows his voice will break if he tries to speak again hence he smiles harder to run away from the solitude and the sadness inside him. He has to be happy.

"It's ok Thor." It's everything Bruce says before hugging him. Thor can't react for several seconds but then he hugs him back and digs his fingers on his clothes like he's about to drown and he's the a lifesaver. And he's not sure when he starts crying. He cries and can't stop no matter how much he tries. Although he is really happy he can't stop crying because he is happy but he's not as happy as he should because Thor can't share that happiness with the person he loves the most; because he has lost him; because he doesn't have Loki back; because his love one won't come back to him; because he has lost everything...

He can't be completely happy. He can't savour this deed, this heroic victory; because he has lost everything and he will never have it back. Because the only wish he has it's impossible to achieve; His only wish is unfeasible. The only person he really wants by his side is dead and Thor can't make him come back to him.

Thor doesn't want to smile; he can't smile for real because he needs to cry; because he is mourning the dead of his love one.

So he cries.

Thor cries desperately with ugly sobs that he can't stop in Bruce's warm and comfortable arms. "I miss him." He murmurs. "I miss Loki." He adds against Bruce's shoulder.

"It's fine Thor; just..." Bruce can't find the proper word for what he wants to say but Thor understands him anyway.

"I want my brother back." He sobs for the first time since he lost him. This is something he has never had the chance to say before. He didn't have the time to mourn him; to cry for him and now that he has started he can't stop. Thor wants his Brother back. Thor wants Loki to come back to him. He doesn't know how to deal with the emptiness in his heart... And he knows he should be happy but he just can't...

Bruce hugs him tighter and Thor thinks he's going to fall because his legs are trembling and he can't... can't... But suddenly there is another pair of arms around him holding him and then another pair and another... And Thor smiles between sobs because he's happy, because he feels loved and even though he has lost everything... He has... Thor smiles and lets the regret, the sorrow, the guilt go through his tears and let space for the love of his comrades; his friends and realizes that he hasn't lost everything. Thor has them; he has the avengers.

Thor feels the sun over them and thinks about Loki. He was right. The sun is rising on them again but it's not as warm as it should without him. It never will be. Bruce's hand touches his cheek and Thor looks at him. Thor smiles still crying. Nothing will be the same without Loki but he's not alone and maybe the sun is not as warm as it used to be but it feels nice against his skin and Thor is happy for that.

He has survived.

Thor has survived but he can't see the point in this. He should have died. He should have die facing Thanos. He should have died along his comrades. He should b dead. He doesn't want to be alive. He's tired of living. He doesn't have anything. His family, his kingdom, his people,

Thor wants to cry but he doesn't have time. He never has time to mourn properly those he loves. Thor is tired but he doesn't have time to rest; there are people who need his help.

 **The end**

I must say after Ragnarok I see Thor and Bruce as really good friends and I feel like Bruce would be the one understanding better Thor's lost. And I really want to give Thor a hug because after everything he deserves it. Thor deserves more love.

If you liked the fic comments and kudos will be welcome.

Thanks for reading.


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